


Something to Tell You

by justanotherbusyfangirl



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M, Trans Dean Winchester
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-05
Updated: 2019-03-05
Packaged: 2019-11-12 14:31:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,245
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18012647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justanotherbusyfangirl/pseuds/justanotherbusyfangirl
Summary: There's something that Dean needs to tell Cas, and he's quite nervous about it.





	Something to Tell You

Dean was nervous, to say the least.  He had been seeing Cas for long enough now that he should have said something, should have mentioned it.  Hell, he usually brought it up on first dates, just to test the waters and sift out the losers who wouldn’t understand from the get-go, but with Cas everything had happened so fast.

And now Dean was falling hard and was afraid that Cas would hate him for keeping something so important a secret.

This could change everything.

This could _ruin_ everything.

It almost came out the other night, which was why Dean decided it’s way past time.  They’d been on a date, out to a pizza place before walking around the park…super romantic and sweet.  Cas had held his hand the whole time, his thumb rubbing Dean’s as they talked about anything and everything.

Cas walked Dean home, taking him to the door like always.  They’d kissed – which they’d done before, of course – but this time it got heated.  Heated enough that Cas backed Dean up against the wall next to his apartment door, their bodies flush against each other…

Dean pushed Cas off then, eyes wide and panicked.  Cas probably thought it was because Dean wanted to take things slow (which he did), but Dean pushed Cas away for an entirely different reason.

Dean had texted an apology the next morning, feeling bad about the way the night ended, and asked Cas for another date.  Cas had accepted without hesitation, which made Dean feel a little better…but he was still nervous.

He offered to cook Cas dinner at his apartment, knowing that he’d rather have a private blowout than a public one, if it came to that.  The lasagna was in the oven and the salad ready to be tossed, Dean was just finishing dressing the garlic bread to pop in the oven when he heard a knock on his door.

He slid the garlic bread into the oven above the lasagna before heading to the door, setting a timer on his phone as he walked.  The phone was back in his pocket when he opened the door, though, giving Cas a smile.

Cas was holding a beautiful bouquet of flowers in one hand and a bottle of wine in the other, and all Dean could think was _How is he so perfect?_

“Hey Cas,” Dean greeted, accepting a chaste kiss and the flowers as he opened the door wide for Cas to come inside. 

“Hey, yourself,” Cas said.  “It smells amazing in here.”

Dean grinned, ushering Cas to the open space of the apartment.  “Thanks, I’m making my mama’s lasagna.  Nothing can beat hers, but I thought I’d try.”

Cas nodded, looking around Dean’s apartment.  While he was occupied, Dean grabbed a large glass to put the flowers in, as he had no fancy vases, and grabbed a couple wine glasses.

“Wanna pour us a drink?” Dean asked, motioning to the bottle of wine still in Cas’s hand.  Cas grinned.

“Sure thing.”  He got to work, giving Dean a chance to check on the lasagna and toss the salad, putting it on the small table where he’d already set plates and silverware.  When he stood straight again, Cas was beside him offering a glass.

“Thanks for having me over,” Cas said, clinking their glasses together before taking a sip.  Dean blushed and tasted the wine, nodding his head at Cas’s selection.

“Of course,” Dean replied, the alarm in his pocket going off.  He put down his wine and went to the oven.  “Have a seat, dinner’s right out.”

Dean busied himself taking the lasagna and garlic bread out, taking a moment for himself before he turned to take things to the table.  He wanted to tell Cas over dinner, not drag it out any longer.  He prayed to whatever god was out there to give him the courage and strength to get through this, no matter what happened.

Cas served them both and they started eating in relative silence, save for the approving moans from Cas at how good the lasagna was.  Dean was happy that the food was good, since it was putting Cas in a good mood and would hopefully bode well for the conversation.

“So, I have something to tell you,” Dean said, looking down at his plate.  Cas hummed, letting Dean know he was listening, and Dean continued.  “I usually tell people that I date much earlier than this, but things have been going so well…”

Cas’s hand on Dean’s made his words trail up and Dean looked up.  “Things have been going _very_ well,” Cas agreed.  Dean blushed and smiled.  Why was he drawing this out for so long?

“I, um.”  Dean swallowed.  “After what happened the other night, I realized I need to tell you, before things go any further…”  Cas nodded, squeezing Dean’s hand.

God, how was he so perfect?

“I’m trans.”  Dean swallowed again, gaining his courage.  He looked at the wall just past Cas’s face, needing to just get it all out.  “I was born a girl, but knew I wasn’t really, and my parents helped me start transitioning in high school.  I got top surgery in college, but haven’t gotten bottom surgery, and don’t really plan on it, at least not right now.  I know this is huge, and that you’re gay, and that this might change everything, but I had to tell you now before things get to be…more.”

Now he looked back at Cas to meet his eyes, realizing that his own had gotten slightly glassy.  Cas had his thinking face on (because Dean knew him well enough now to know what his thinking face looked like) and then he shifted.  Cas pulled his napkin from his lap and put it on the table next to his plate.

Oh, god, Dean was glad they were doing this at his apartment, so that he didn’t have to live through the humiliation of Cas walking out on him in public.  The tears in his eyes started to spill over and he braced himself for whatever judgmental words were about to come from Cas’s mouth.

Surprisingly, though, when Cas left his chair it wasn’t to go for the door.  Instead he slid onto the floor next to Dean’s chair, turning Dean’s body to face him.  Cas’s hands moved to cup Dean’s face and he smiled when their eyes met.

“Thank you for telling me, I can tell this was hard for you,” Cas started.  Dean nodded slightly, trying to swallow the frog that was bubbling in his throat.  “But let me just say right now, none of that matters to me.  Yes, I wish you’d told me sooner, but I’m glad that I have your trust to know now.  All I have to say is that because you waited this long, I can tell you this for certain – it doesn’t matter who you _were_ , because I’m falling for who you _are_ …no matter if you have a penis or not.”

Cas grinned at the end of his speech, but Dean could tell he was just trying to lighten the mood.  His tears were flowing freely now and Cas wiped them away with his thumbs.  Overwhelmed with it all, Dean launched forward to catch Cas’s lips with his own, pouring all his gratitude and happiness into the kiss. 

Now Dean knew for certain that Cas was truly an angel, and luckily he was all Dean’s.


End file.
